Hanging Out In the Balance

Submitted by Michael, 2/7/11 - from Siem Reap (where we watched the sunrise over Angkor Wat instead of the Super Bowl)

Pretty much all we’ve been doing is visiting spectacular, memorable sites; taking in the sunsets; relaxing w/either a banana pineapple shake or local brew; making new friends; taking naps, and living the life of the Riley family. Oh, did I mention sleeping late and being waited on?

NOT!

If any of you hold images of our travels being revolving around the grand trio of gracious service, comforting surroundings, and do what you want when you want -- it just ain’t so, at least not for the MAJK FAM so far. Not only are we traveling lesser developed countries (which don’t exactly work like clockwork), but traveling as a family adds a whole other level of… well, shall I say “color”?... into the equation. Like everything else in this world, our travel experience is already full of duality – the easy and difficult, the exciting and unexciting, the energized and drained. You can think of it as the yin-yan of the road.

On one hand there have been numerous incredible moments: highs of first experiences, magical synchronicities, shifts of comprehension, new tastes, meeting people – the most wonderful of which engage and illuminate all 4 of us simultaneously. But we are different people with varying temperaments, interests and motivations. This creates occasional challenges which we may or more often may not expect, bringing us to the “other hand” such as when I’m practically jumping out of my skin – my mind spinning with all the possible experiences that await just outside our guest house door, yet one or more of AJK are not game to trail blaze yet another new cultural path for any number of reasons. The reality is A&K have less stamina, resilience and appetite to “see it all” than do J & I. Understandable. Absolutely! I for sure envisioned this way back when conceptualizing the trip. But that isn’t always the easiest to manage in real time, although I think we’re all doing a great job of it all things considered. Talk about experiencing the give and take – on so many levels - which to me is an extremely valuable growth experience. And in an odd way, a unifying one for us all too – testing each other’s tolerances, and then coming to the other’s rescue when it’s needed most. We’re not yet 1 month in – but I can already imagine how incredibly bonded we will be when we’re spit out from the other end of this traveler roller coaster we're riding.

We’ve been holed up in a modest yet comfortable guesthouse in Bangkok for over 1 week, waiting 6 business days to get visas for India. (Side note – India was not in our original travel plans, but it is now - enticed by $150 airfares from Bangkok to Delhi & inspired by the overall experience it offers. I’m the one who was seduced by the possibility [aka – the “responsible party”] – and having traveled India 20 years back, I’m feeling the tightrope walk between the incredible insights and perspective transformation I believe it will bring and the concerns of the challenges that likely come with the package.) Since we were biding our time in Bangkok, and huge cities aren’t our most desired prolonged locations, we decided to use the time to get a jump on schoolwork (trying to get ahead, and bank time for our next leg, Angkor Wat, where we’ll want to tour more and study less – another yin-yan of the road example.) So we held “class” most of our days here (that topic is a whole other set of blog posts, lemme tell ya…), from approx 9-10am till 1-2:30pm. One might assume that means we can tour in the afternoon, yes? Well… sometimes. Let’s just say that our guesthouse’s little swimming pool is at least as big a draw as another huge golden Buddha, exotic market scene or new wide eyed experience for a couple of MAJK FAM during these last few days. And I, the experience junkie, am gradually finding peace with this. (Jeanne may expound on “just how gradual this progress is – hopefully away from my earshot.) Question: What Dad wouldn’t want to play tennis ball catch w/his kids in the pool? Possible Answer: One who never got a chance to use any of Bangkok’s free “Smile bikes” given to tourists to explore the city another unique way. But truth be told, the gift of 7-months of travel togetherness has already begun grinding away the urgency edge off my experience appetite. It’s comforting to take the long view of balancing family time and the growth it brings with my desire for adventure and immersing ourselves in new experiences. In the end it’s all good – particularly if we balance the yin-yan.

Amidst the handful of traveler families we interviewed prior to our departure, we distilled some of their invaluable info into 2 very wise words of council (and when we make the MAJK movie it will be delivered by a wise, monk-like sage): “Animals. Water.” What this means is it’s pretty much guaranteed that our children will be engaged and delighted when our activities revolve around either of these elements. Yesterday’s dip in the pool energized us sufficiently to venture to Chinatown for dinner on Chinese New Years. It was absolutely jam packed: shoulder to shoulder, red shirted crowds shuffling along and vending or eating in absolutely every sidewalk parcel, nook & cranny. Quite a spectacle, but disappointing none the less for AK given the absence of firecrackers, which was the original inspiration and catalyst for our pilgrimage. But alas, about 8:55pm when we had enough and fatigue was setting in, crowds started lining the main street and an electric buzz of anticipation began ti build. So we waited too – maybe a parade? Fireworks? Performances? Some unimagined spectacle not to be missed? All of the above? About 10 minutes later we saw several vehicles pull up 100 yards from us – and another minute passed, and then the crowd “ooo’ed”, and that was it! Apparently we, amongst 100’s of others, were in proximity for the Princess of Thailand’s annual entrance to a particular Chinese temple where she commemorates the holiday, and then others rush in to get the good ju-ju of being on her coat tails to do the same. So – we have now (nearly) been in the presence of royalty. I wondered, did her appearance explain the seemingly incongruous vendor I had seen prior who was selling a couple dozen relatively large Disneyesque princess dolls on the sidewalk? (“What’s that about?” I thought, yet at this point that’s a private thought-form I repeat at least 10-20 times/day.) Whoops – just saw a toad sang a fly off the floor in this restaurant – no matter…

Or the day before – A&K got to ride an elephant, and also hold an apparently benign, 4-foot long albino python. Yes, both experiences were slightly cheesy and staged tourist affectations but they sure were further confirmation of our “animals strategy.” They did this at the “Rose Garden”, a Thai cultural center located 45 minutes outside the capital. That was a fantastic day for all, even if this Thai cultural center was synthesized for tourists and not the “authentic, real thing.”. (Hopefully you will hear more about it from another MAJK member.) We walked through over a dozen cultural stations, being taught hands on in martial arts, bamboo dancing, palm leaf origami, and more. We all loved the experience of husking rice, flower decoration, and making a clay pot in the old style, but Jeanne and I found the demonstration converting silkworm cocoons into silk cloth particularly fascinating. About 1-2 dozen cocoons were simmering, each with a single, unraveling, fine strand that in combination are hand cranked around a spool to form silk thread – and as each cocoon become spent (denoted by yielding a dead pupa) others were added. Very fine, very special, very timeless, very Zen. Is that what people did before email and Game Boy, I wondered?

So – there you have it. This trip has lots of ebb and flow – some high tides are higher than others, and same for low tides too. Talk about low – how about arriving in Bangkok at 5am, after a 12-hour overnight bus ride, without a hotel in this big city where we were immediately on guard of our possessions, children and self? On first glance it felt like the hostile, unintelligible, huge city, having been dropped at a remote bus stop in morning's pitch darkness. In our haze we taxied to the Khao San Rd travelers ghetto where we figured it would be easiest to land, found a café w/WiFi (checking email is always a boost – particularly for the kids so please email kiralipson9@gmail.com and AdamL98@gmail.com and holed up there. Which reminds me – add a third word to our family travel mantra: “Treats.” When in pain, buy a treat. This time it was large chocolate frappes – not my ideal 5am libation, but it sure did wonders for A&K at that hour, as you can just imagine. Adam & I went out to “hunt, kill and provide” (Aka - “find us a decent hotel room – ASAP!”) Fortunately the travel gods were smiling upon us, which translates to after 5-10 “no vacancies” or “too grimy and depressing's”, we found us the holy grail - an elusive “Family Room” (most places are set up for couples and singles – it’s a lot tougher to find a room that will accommodate all 4 of us) at a nice, practically spotless, yet affordable riverside hotel with a pool. Not only that - the rook was vacant already. This is almost unheard of! So we didn’t have to wait until 2 pm to check in. When Jeanne arrived in her sleep deprived state she called me “her hero” and there was joy in Mudville yet again.

We’re now off to Siem Reap, Cambodia – location of the famed Angkor Wat temple. Where you can be rest assured that we’ve already reserved a guesthouse w/a swimming pool, and will find ample ice cream and other sweets to buoy our sprits through the private guided touring that we have already arranged. The ruins await!